


Did you miss me?

by alexisriversong



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Case Fic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Fluff and Smut, I suck at tags, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Virgin!Sherlock, a bit of angst, i hate mary, kind of, she is not dead though, sorry for taking care of her
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-07
Updated: 2014-08-20
Packaged: 2018-02-12 03:21:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2093802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexisriversong/pseuds/alexisriversong
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I suck at summaries... I will just say that I was inspired by a post I saw on facebook that was taken from tumblr and that a friend of mine commented on a group, about Sherlock crying because John got married and John finding him with puffy, red eyes and thinking he was on drugs again and leaving him...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is almost finished so I will post one chapter a day... I think is going to be 4 chapters but I'm not sure... Rated E for future chapters...
> 
> This is my first Johnlock... hope you like it!!!
> 
> I'm Italian and I don't have a beta so forgive any mistake (if there is someone who wants to beta this work for me just send me a message) 
> 
> My tumblr has the same url as my AO3 profile if you want to follow me!!!
> 
> I own nothing, all the characters are from Arthur Conan Doyle genius mind and from the BBC tv show...

John stood in the middle of the house he shared with his wife, his hands clenched in fists and anger flowing his body. He closed his eyes trying to calm himself.

He slowly unclenched his fingers and opened his eyes. He held a crumpled piece of paper in his hand. After knowing that Mary was not the woman he thought she was, John had done a paternity test. How was he supposed to believe her now? At the time, he had told her it was just a normal amniocentesis to check on the health of the baby. 

After she had shot Sherlock, John had forgiven her, for the baby’s sake, but this was too much. The paternity test had resulted negative. 

He got into the room where she was sleeping and slammed the door. Mary woke up, startled by the noise.

“Who’s the father?” She looked at him with wide eyes. He had spoken in a calm tone, he didn’t care anymore, maybe he had never even been truly in love with her even before. Maybe he didn’t even know what real love was. “Who’s the father?” he asked again throwing the paternity test on his wife’s lap. She looked at it and a tear rolled down her face.

“I’m sorry John. I’m so sorry” John’s rage begun to rise again.

“Who the hell is the father?!” he shouted to her.

Mary sat upright on the bed to face him. Wet lines running across her face.

“His name is Sebastian Moran. He used to work for Moriarty. He had tried to recruit me some years ago but I always refused. After Moriarty’s death he came back for me, said he loved me and wanted to live together and then disappeared for six months without news. Then I met you and fell in love with you and we were going to marry. Then he came back saying he was sorry and I shouldn’t marry you. I said no, he insisted and we ended up in bed together. It was just a onetime thing. I told him it was over. I had no idea the child was his. And now Moriarty is back and I think he will kill me because Moran was his lover first” She was crying now. John closed his eyes, the anger strangely made him think more clearly.

“Didn’t you ever think that this was his plan all along? Get you on his side to arrive at me and then at Sherlock? I thought you were more clever than this, Mary. I think you should get dressed, I’ll call Mycroft, he’ll get you under protection if you agree to tell him more about Moran, I’m sure he’d be delighted. It could help stop Moriarty. I’ll get the wedding invalidated saying it was under false pretenses, which is the truth, and I won’t see you anymore” At this he got his mobile from his pocket and rang Mycroft.

Barely half an hour later, Mary was under Mycroft cares and John was alone in his flat. He missed 221B, he missed his flatmate, his best friend, he knew Sherlock wasn’t doing good after killing a men, almost had to go to die in a mission and be taken back because of the reappearance of his worst enemy whom had forced him to fake his death two years before. He would probably need him. One thing was sure, he needed his bed friend, now more than ever. 

He got up and grabbed his coat, planning to ask Sherlock to take him back in the flat. Maybe he would forgive him for being so stupid as to give a second chance to Mary and for not helping him with the Moriarty case that he knew was yet to be solved. While he summoned a cab, a though stabbed him, what if Sherlock had went back to old habits and begun to use again after being unable to catch the criminal? He shook his head and got in the cab.

“221 B, Baker Street please”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock point of view this time... John doesn't like what awaits him in 221B...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This first chapters are short but the story is getting longer and longer so don't worry about that...

Sherlock had been crying a lot lately. He had cried after the wedding, after being shot, after John had decided to stay with Mary for the sake of his future child, after killing Magnusson for John, he had been crying almost every day, after Moriarty’s return and the increasing number of crimes he had been committing, for not being able to concentrate enough to catch the man. He knew the problem, he missed John, his blogger, his best friend, his flatmate, his light… his unrequited love. 

John had always denied to be gay, he didn’t want him in the same way as he did. Sherlock had never been in love, had always hid his feelings under the cover of being an “Highly Functional Sociopath”, he knew he had feelings but never learnt how to express them. His brother had told him more than once that caring was not an advantage, he knew now, it really wasn’t. 

“Love hurts” he whispered at the empty flat “I wish John was here” he sat on his chair on his pajama pants and dressing gown, a t-shirt lose on his chest, he didn’t eat much anymore without John and now his clothes were all too big for him. Hugging his legs to his chest and resting his forehead on his knees, he begun to cry again. When he finished his tears he stood there, still, his thoughts unable to concentrate on Moriarty’s reappearance. He had nowhere to hide, his Mind Palace was full of John, he was just the shadow of himself now. 

What a shame for a Holmes. He didn’t care.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t hear the sounds of someone climbing the stairs to 221B until he heard the door open and John’s footsteps on the carpet. 

“Sherlock? Are you here?” The detective got up faster than ever and hurried to wipe his tears away. He heard John leave the mobile on the kitchen table before heading for the sitting room. 

“He-Hello John” said Sherlock trying not to sound shaken by his friend’s presence “What takes you here?” He observed his friend. He deduced he had a row with Mary of some kind, it must have been about the baby because he was clearly shaken, he had discovered something, the baby was not his. For a second the realization made him happy then he rethought about it. 

Probably John was really shaken and needed comfort, it was not good to be happy about that. A part of his brain whispered that now John was a free man, he could be with Sherlock again. He still was stubborn about not being gay tough. 

He frowned, in his deducing frenzy he had lost focus on John, now the soldier was looking at him with fury, why was that? Had he deduced out loud and hurt his feelings somehow or was it something different?

“What’s wrong John?”

“Like you haven’t already deduced it” was the angry answer.

“I- I think that you have left Mary because the child isn’t yours” Something like guilt passed through John’s face but then the anger was back. “Don’t feel guilty for telling Mycroft before me, it’s ok, it was the right thing to do. Was she a danger to security then? Who was the baby’s father?”

"Sebastian Moran, works for Moriarty” Was the automatic angry answer. Sherlock realized that the anger in the answer was directed against him tough. That was weird.

“Why are you angry at me John?”

“Why? Why? Look at you, Sherlock! Puffy eyes, guilty face... Did you went back on drugs? I thought you left those. I already have problems on my own! Do you think I also need yours?”

Sherlock was shocked, unable to mutter a coherent phrase, he understood why John would have thought that, he must look like a complete mess, he just kept shaking his head. “No, no, no, I’m not on drugs again, believe me please, John”

John clenched his teeth, his hands were shaking. “I don’t want to hear your excuses! You know that drugs are not the solution. Why did you got back on drugs? If you died for real what would I do? You are my only real friend” He didn’t even want to look at him. Sherlock tried to get closer with his hands in front of him, feeling the desire to touch and reassure John that he was ok, he would never hurt him that way. 

“Don’t touch me!” the doctor shouted lifting his arms angrily. He turned and headed for the door. 

Sherlock heard his only friend disappear down the stairs without even letting him explain. Why had John thought he was on drugs again? He would never do that. Why had he left? He felt so alone. Sherlock curled on the floor and resumed to cry.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John realizes his mistake...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to whom left kudos... Anyone who wants to beta this fanfiction is welcome...
> 
> Another short chapter... I had no internet so I was unable to post for two days... I don't know when I'll have a connection again so I could post tomorrow or in a week for all I know... Sorry if you are reading this and want to know the end...

John had left 221B in anger, without even closing the doors. He had just stormed out of the building. He had been able to accept one deception but two, two were too much.

He decided to call Greg to go to the pub and get drunk. He needed to forget the day. He rummaged inside his coat pockets but found nothing. “Shit!” He had left his mobile on the kitchen table in 221B. He turned around. 

He had to go back in. He breathed deeply, calmed himself a bit and climbed the stairs for the second time that day. Sherlock hadn’t closed the door after he had rushed away. “Weird” he thought. He got in and walked towards the kitchen table and grabbed his phone. He felt sobs from the sitting room. Was Sherlock crying? Had he been crying before? Maybe that was why his eyes were so red and puffy. He suddenly felt guilty for shouting at him like that. 

John rushed back in the sitting room. Sherlock was curled on the floor, his sobs shaking his shoulders, his curls sticking to his forehead, he looked a right mess. John was unable to stay there, still, looking at him, knowing his best friend was crying for his fault. 

It hurts to see someone you love crying, more so if the one who made them cry is yourself.

He knelt on the floor and put his hand on Sherlock back. The detective froze at the touch, then leaned in it. “John” he sobbed “I’m not on drugs I promise… please, believe m-” another sob shook him, he couldn’t finish the sentence. John didn’t need him to, he believed him.

“I’m sorry Sherlock. You are not on drugs, you had been crying. I’m so stupid, I know, I’m an idiot. I did not mean to make you cry. You always say that I see but I don’t observe. You are right and I’m truly an idiot. Forgive me please” Sherlock rested his head on his lap and curled around him, nuzzling his thigh with his nose. It was like a nod and a need for human contact at the same time. 

John felt tears dampening his trousers but he didn’t care. He caressed Sherlock’s curls, they were soft under the touch, he had always wanted to touch them but had never dared. He thought about his thoughts since he was back in the flat. Now, with the long slim figure of the detective curled up around him on the floor, a thought shot him. 

It hurts to see people you love crying, it hurts to see Sherlock cry. So, John loved Sherlock. He closed his eyes and tried to think about that realization. What kind of love was that? It was surely more than friendship.

He was not gay, he had never been attracted by men. Anyway, he had been attracted by Sherlock since from the beginning. He was gorgeous, he was brilliant and he was a fantastic detective, exactly what he needed at the time they met. He was his adrenaline rush. 

He also was an insufferable prat most of the time, completely oblivious about how to socialize with people, he just disappeared for days without letting him know, he played the violin during the night and never made his own tea.

John kept stroking Sherlock hair, feeling the detective relax under his touch. 

He remembered his best friend speech at his wedding, it had been a declaration of love, he realized how much must have hurt him to know that John was getting married, probably had thought he had lost him forever. John looked at the face of the man on his lap. His eyes, red and puffy for crying, where closed, his face was calm, like he had finally been able to fall asleep after a long time awake. That was probably true considering it was Sherlock Holmes whom he was talking about. 

John lost count of the time he stood there, stroking his friend’s hair, thinking about everything that he loved about him. After a while he repositioned himself so he had his back pressed against the wall, he wasn’t young anymore and the position he had been in, wasn’t exactly comfortable, sitting on the floor in the middle of the sitting room, with a consulting detective wrapped around his body. 

Not that he minded the last bit of the situation. 

He kept stroking Sherlock hair until his own eyes closed and he fell asleep. He knew that he was going to have a lot of pain on his back once he woke up, but he didn’t care, he just wanted to stay there, with Sherlock cuddled around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter has PORN!!! And the following one too... but I am getting to the case part soon ;)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is pretty much shower sex and feelings...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally today I have a decent Internet connection and I can post a new chapter... This is longer ;) I just get carried away with sex scenes sorry (not sorry at all actually :P ) 
> 
> Thanks to all the people who commented and left kudos!!!! I love you all!!!!
> 
> PS: If someone wants to beta this work is welcome...

When Sherlock woke up, the first thing he noticed was that he was on the floor, his cheeks were wet and salty, he was curled around someone, and that someone was caressing his hair. 

He remembered crying himself to sleep in John’s lap, pretty much in the same situation he was now, petting his curls. He heard a moan when John caressed his hair once more, he jerked away from the contact after realizing it had come from himself, he pressed his hands against his mouth in horror at what that must have sounded like for a man who wasn’t gay and was just trying to comfort his crying best friend.

John startled at the moan and then, suddenly, Sherlock was away from him, his hands pressing over his mouth, his eyes wide, like he had done something unforgivable. John just smiled at him, grabbed his hands and hugged him close. 

Sherlock froze, slowly, he moved closer to the shorter man, his arms flew at his blogger’s neck, his nose pressed against his blonde hair. This close to the man, Sherlock noticed the little changes in color, how the light reflected on his friend’s curls, it had grown longer since the last time he had been able to observe it properly. He closed his eyes and inhaled. John smelt like the cheap shampoo he used, something that was supposed to be lilies, he could also smell the wool of his jumpers, the light smell of sweat of his skin, the smell of the clinic and something sweet and reassuring that was all John, it was like coming home. 

The detective stood there, hugging his friend for what seemed like hours. After a bit, John, disentangled himself from Sherlock, grabbed his hand and got up. His legs protesting after so many time on the floor. The taller man followed his movement and let his friend take him to the bathroom. He knew he needed a shower, it was obvious that he didn’t smell well. He hadn’t had much time to take care of himself since he had come back, but he didn’t want to leave John, not even for the time needed to take a shower. 

It seemed that his worries were unnecessary, John entered the bathroom and turned the shower on, then he begun to help Sherlock out of his clothes. When the man was completely naked in front of him John grabbed his neck, looking into his eyes, just to make sure that he hadn’t misunderstood anything, Sherlock hadn’t exactly said anything about his feelings since he had found him last night. 

Sherlock’s eyes were wide, understanding what was going to happen and didn’t know what to do about it but wanting it nonetheless. He was speechless but he nodded and that seemed enough for John. 

Not for the first time, John, wondered if Sherlock was a virgin. The idea of being his first and last lover was suddenly very appealing. He tugged at the detective’s head and stood on tiptoes so he could reach his lips. 

The kiss they shared was caste, not wanting to scare him off. Sherlock was not of the same opinion, suddenly, he seemed to remember he had hands and grabbed at the back of John neck. He had thought so many times about kissing John, get inside him, having him inside his body, mark him as his possession, become one with him.

Sherlock Holmes had accepted that he was in love with John Watson a long time ago, when he had faked his death, he already knew then. He had never desired a relationship, he had never had wet dreams, he had thought sex was boring, but then John had come along and he had begun to have fantasies, and now he was going to be able to do something about it. 

He was clearly inexperienced, he had kissed Janine only with his mouth closed, he had showered while she was in the same room but they never touched then, he had the excuse of not wanting to rush things with her, but with John… with him, he wanted more. He opened his mouth and licked at the other man’s lips hesitantly.

John felt Sherlock’s tongue against his lips and parted them, deepening the kiss, his tongue slipping inside the other man’s mouth, taking charge. He felt the other man skin under his fingers and suddenly remembered that they were in the bathroom because Sherlock needed a shower. He pushed him away and into the shower, smiling at the disappointed whimper that escaped the detective’s mouth. 

John smiled at the younger man, proudly noticing that the kiss had had a very interesting effect on him. Sherlock’s cock was long and hard, already leaking precum just after one kiss, John licked his lips at the thought of what would feel like to be with him, in him.

Sherlock mentally prepared himself to a quick shower in order to go back to John soon. He never expected the man to join him, it was quite hard to concentrate when the small frame of his friend was so close to him. 

Sherlock stared at the man in front of him, all that white skin, the scar on his shoulder, the muscles gained during the period in the army still clearly defined, his thick cock, a bit shorter than his but still impressively hard and leaking precum. John wanted him. The idea of being wanted, of having a possibility with the man he had loved for so many time. 

Sherlock licked his lips, he had the sudden urge to taste John, he had no idea of what to do about it though. 

“I-I’ve never- I’ve never been in a relationship before” he said finally, his voice raspy after all the time he had been crying and the silence afterwards. That wasn’t exactly what he wanted to say, what if John wasn’t interested in a relationship with him but was taking pity on him because he had obviously been crying for him. He tried to correct himself. “I mean- not that I haven’t kissed anyone- I kissed Janine- for that case- but- all the rest- I…”

John stopped his rambling with a soft kiss on his lips. “I know” the shorter man stepped closer to him, “I know you… I know that you haven’t done this before… any of this” he pointed at their bodies now almost touching, “I can go slow if you want, but… I love you Sherlock, okay? This is not for pity or whatever that clever mind of yours is suggesting this is. Just to be clear”

Sherlock looked at him, eyes wide, mouth open in surprise, was it that easy to read him? No one had even been able to know what he was thinking, no one had ever loved him knowing how he was like. But this was not anyone, this was John, it made sense he would know better. 

“Do you really love me John?” He asked, hating himself for the tone in his voice, it sounded like he was begging for a positive answer.

“I really do Sherlock, I think I always did. But I never realized what kind of love mine was. I thought it was just friendship, with you being a man and me not being gay. But I realize that maybe it’s just you. I thought I loved Mary, but that wasn’t love. This is” The younger man smiled widely, his eyes brightening. He hugged John, their flesh connecting at least, sending sparks through their bodies.

“I love you too John. I love you so much, it hurt not to be at your side, it hurt to leave you, it hurt to see Magnusson flicking your face, that was also one of the reasons I pulled the trigger you know? It hurt to say goodbye to you. I cried so much, I didn’t want to make you angry, you always said you were not gay and I thought I didn’t stand a chance. I’ve never had the need for sex until I met you, always thought anything people did was boring. It was so hard to see you marry someone that was not me but I just wanted to see you happy. It hurt to see the pain in your face when I came back, the anger, it felt so wrong. I did what I did for you, it has been horrible when I was without you. I hated to think that you wouldn’t be there when I came back, because you were with Mary…” his voice broke and he begun to sob again.

John soothed him, caressed his back with his hands. “I’m here Sherlock, I won’t ever leave you. We’ll be together, I’m sorry you had to suffer like this. I didn’t know, I didn’t know you loved me, and I am not gay, but I love you and I don’t care you are a man. It’s you I love… Ok?” He repeated again. Sherlock nodded.  
Then they smiled at each other and kissed, Sherlock quickly learnt to kiss back, playfully nipping his lover’s lower lip and sucking it in his mouth. They began to rut against each other, moaning softly, licking at each other mouth. 

Sherlock had waited for this for so long that he felt he was unable to wait anymore. John seemed to understand that the detective needed to relieve some of the tension and grabbed both their cocks in hand beginning to stroke fast. 

“Wait, John, I wa- want- FUCK! –I want to have…” John stopped and looked up to his lover waiting for him to finish the sentence. Sherlock calmed a bit and finished his sentence. “I want to have proper sex with you, feel you in me or the other way round… I don’t care very much about that, though I am not experienced so prob…” 

John stopped him with a kiss. “After the shower” he promised “let’s just relieve the tension first, yeah?” Sherlock nodded and the soldier begun to stroke them again.

The feeling of their cocks rubbing against each other mixed with the promise of more to come was more that the consulting detective could bear and he came hard, John followed immediately after. 

Both man panting and sated, the water cleaning the mess of themselves almost immediately. Sherlock found himself on the shower floor with John’s compact body pressed at his side. They chuckled at the situation. 

John’s laugh faded after a bit. “I’m sorry Sherlock, that was your first time, wasn’t it? I should have waited, made it memorable, not this rutting against each other in the shower like bloody teenagers” Sherlock just pressed a finger on John’s lips.

“Do shut up. I’m not complaining at all. It was the most… interesting thing that could have happened to me. I can think again now, I have control over my mind again, I know you love me and I know you won’t leave again…” he stopped then, suddenly insecure “you won’t leave would you?”

John smiled and shook his head “I won’t leave you unless you ask me to and I really really believe that it is what you want”

“Then you would never leave me, Jawn, never!” was the immediate answer to his statement. John chuckled at the way his name had come out of Sherlock’s mouth and kissed him again. He tugged him up so they were now standing under the water together again. 

Slowly John grabbed the shampoo and begun to clean Sherlock hair, the other man smiled and begun to scrub some soap on John’s body, they cleaned each other thoroughly, scrubbing every inch of their partner’s skin, cleaning each other happily and exchanging soft kisses during all the process. Once they had finished they dried their bodies and then, without bothering with clothes, the detective begun to tug John towards his room. John had promised to have proper sex after the shower after all…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sex scenes are not finished yet (John has promised...) There is going to be something about the case in the next chapter...


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John has promised...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end of this chapter there is a little hint about the case part of this story... It's the first time I try to solve a case in a fic, it's going to be fun to try, dunno if you are going to like this part though, I am not good at this... probably is gonna be too easy to understand where I am trying to go with the story...

John followed without complaining. The room was a mess. The bed was completely covered in books and rubbish. Sherlock frowned at the sight. 

“I’m sorry, think we have to clean up a bit here” He said clearly embarrassed. 

An embarrassed Sherlock was not something you see every day, thought John looking at the man. He was gorgeous.

John followed the naked detective with his eyes when he begun to clean up the room. John smiled and helped him, they changed the bed sheets and threw a pair of experiments that Sherlock had forgotten about. 

Sherlock then sat on the bed, his hands unable to find a place to stop, they were both still naked. He looked nervous. 

“I want to have proper sex John” He looked insecure and was trembling slightly.

“We don’t have to have penetrative sex yet Sherlock, we just had pretty good orgasms in the shower and I don’t know if I’ll even be able to have another one so soon, I’m not that young anymore. And, I mean, I understand if you want to wait, to be sure of me” He was lying, he could have loads of orgasms if his partner was Sherlock, he was sure of that… The other man looked at him.

“I’m sure about this John, I just want you, want to feel you inside me, I’ve waited enough, but I don’t know what to do, what if I’m not good enough? If you still prefer women? I’ve read about sex, I know the theory but that’s not the same as practice” John held his breath, listening to that voice of his, saying that he wanted to feel him inside himself, that did things to him. He didn’t care about him not being a woman and all the other things he was saying. 

“Shut up Sherlock” he grabbed the other man’s neck to pull him in for another kiss. Sherlock closed his eyes, losing himself in the kiss. They separated when they needed to breath. The consulting detective tried to argue again.

“But John…” The man in question shut him up with another kiss then began to talk against his lips.

“Sherlock, I clearly showed you that I really don’t care that you are not a woman, I knew this before getting in the shower, couldn’t really have missed that, could I? I don’t regret anything about us if not that I didn’t notice before of my feelings and yours. We could have been together for a long time now if I wasn’t so stupid”

He knelt between Sherlock’s legs and leaned in for yet another sweet kiss. Doing so he rubbed his body against the other man’s. He felt Sherlock’s cock harden rubbing on his abdomen, he smiled and, without warning him, he grabbed the other man’s hips and leaned down. He licked the underside of that gorgeous cock.   
Sherlock’s hissed at the contact and tried to buck his hips to get more friction on his cock but John’s strong hands kept his hips still. Sometimes he just forgot that under the jumpers there was a strong soldier, a man who had killed a lot of men and healed a lot more. That thought aroused him a lot.

When John lowered himself and took Sherlock’s length in his mouth the detective felt his orgasm approaching again exaggeratedly quickly. He had never felt something like being given head and the fact that was John’s mouth that his cock was in made him want to come hard. He tried to push the soldier away to regain control of himself. John had begun to suck hard, swirling his tongue around the head and then sliding down, taking almost all the length of his cock into his mouth.

“John-“ he panted “If- if- you keep- going- I’m- I’m gonna…” John understood the need to come of his friend and suddenly wanted to taste him so much, to feel his come down his throat, to swallow everything he had got, but that would have to wait, he wanted them to come together while he was inside him. He moaned around Sherlock, knowing the effects such an act produced on another man, the vibrations running along his body. 

The detective looked down at John, his cock disappearing inside the cavern of that hot mouth, that tongue doing unforgivable things to him, the moans the little man produced during the act reverberated through him. 

John sucked harder, his left hand going down, under Sherlock buttocks, caressing his cleft and circling his anus. He didn’t want to penetrate him yet so he just teased his entrance, the detective seemed to appreciate because he gasped loudly at the sensation. 

And then John just let go of him and pressed the underside of his cock between his thumb and pointing finger impeding the orgasm that was threatening to take his partner over the edge. 

Sherlock moaned at the loss and tried to grab the doctor and push him down again to end the job but he didn’t move. 

“I want this to last Sherlock, we are not really that young and I know you are inexperienced but I want us to come together and I want to come inside you” The other man seemed to agree but he was a bit frustrated anyway. A little pout appeared on his face. John just kissed the head of the other man’s cock before looking at Sherlock and kissing his pout away. “Do you have lube?”

The other man just reached towards his bedside table, fumbled a bit and found what he was looking for, he gave it to John. “I use it to please myself sometimes, when I really need it, but I’ve got no condoms” he whispered embarrassed. John smiled and caressed his lover’s face. He kissed him again trying to pour in the kiss all his feelings and calm his lover down.

“I’m clean, I’ve been tested when I did the paternity test, if you don’t mind I would very much like to come inside you” The other man beamed and nodded eagerly. The idea of having John’s cum inside his body was very interesting. He should take a sample afterward and examine it carefully. 

John noticed the swift in Sherlock attention immediately and claimed his mouth again to try and have the detective’s full attention back. 

It worked, every atom of Sherlock’s body was now focused on John’s body and what the man was doing. His gaze followed his lover’s hand when he coated it with lube and begun pushing at his entrance. The curly haired man opened his legs wider and tried to relax to let John open him up more easily. John groaned and pushed his middle finger inside the tight opening. 

Sherlock gasped, a mix of pleasure and pain taking power of him. John didn’t move until the taller man begun to push himself down to get more friction. The blonde man begun to finger fuck him, trying to find the other man’s prostate, Sherlock was moaning between pain and pleasure and was just beginning to get a bit uncomfortable when suddenly his hips fled from the bed and he shouted as pleasure overtook the pain.

John grinned at his reaction, steadied his lover’s hips and added a second finger without being noticed, then proceeded to hit the other man’s prostate every few strokes until Sherlock was begging him to give him more. 

Nodding, he added a third finger and watched in awe the reaction that caused on the detective. He was looking into John’s eyes, his mouth open in a silent scream of pleasure, unable to say anything, that beautiful mind of his concentrated just on John, on his fingers inside his body and the pleasure they were giving him, still fighting to understand that this was really happening and fighting the urge to come again just from being fingered. 

It was amazing to be able to see that expression on the man’s face. Like always when he did something great, John felt the need to appraise his lover. 

“Sherlock, you are so fucking beautiful, your body is amazing and you feel so good around my digits, you have got three inside you and your ass is so greedy and wants more” the man in question closed his eyes and tried to thrust to gain more friction on his neglected cock, but John grasp was firm and didn’t let him. 

With a great strength, Sherlock opened his eyes and looked down, the sight of John’s fingers disappearing inside him would have been enough to make him come but he wanted more. He looked down John’s body until he caught sight of the hard length of his cock and licked his lips. 

John groaned. “Do you want it?” He pointedly looked at the other man “You are gagging for it aren’t you?” Sherlock nodded.

“Please… Jo…hn!” he gasped. John nodded, removed his fingers and the detective whimpered at the loss. 

The blonde man climbed on him and, after positioning a pillow under Sherlock’s backside to lift his hips, he positioned himself at his entrance. Sherlock’s eyes were wide and he looked a bit scared though he really wanted to have John inside him. John kissed him soothingly and the other man hungrily answered. 

John broke apart from the kiss, lubed his length and took it in hand then pushed slowly inside his lover. They both groaned at the sensation.

John’s cock was really bigger than three fingers and the stretch hurt a bit but soon Sherlock could feel that the pleasure was a much more interesting sensation. 

He could feel himself so full, he was complete, he had what he had missed all his life now. He suddenly understood what people said about being a half of a whole. A half of a whole… that was an interesting thought but he was unable to concentrate on his significance at the moment. All his focus was now on the blonde man between his legs, inside his body and giving him the most pleasurable experience of his life. If he had thought that the frotting in the shower was incredible, this was even better.

Both man moaned when John begun to move. Sherlock felt he was going to come soon but John was moving so slowly. He closed his legs and arms around the other man and turned them over until he was seated on top of the soldier. 

They were both surprised by the detective’s actions but it didn’t last long, soon Sherlock was riding John with a steady rhythm and they were both shouting in pleasure at the new depth of the position. Sherlock rested his hands at both sides of the blonde’s head to lower himself. He kissed John while moving on him, his cock heavy between their stomachs.

The sensation was too much for both of them and soon they were coming. The feeling of John’s cum inside his body was enough to tip the detective over the edge. The pleasure of the orgasm was too much for Sherlock and he fell on top of John, his senses in overdrive, no thoughts in his head, for once, his head was silent. 

He must have blacked out because the next thing he felt was John, cleaning him up with a wet towel. The shorter man got in the bed and he cuddled at his side, his eyes closed and his breath still a bit irregular. 

John kissed him again, softly. “That… was amazing” 

Sherlock smiled “That’s not what people usually say about me”

“What does people say?” John asked remembering the same conversation from all those years before.

“Piss off” The detective said grinning. He kissed John’s mouth. “You know… I fell in love with you that day, that very first day, when you killed that cabbie to save my life. I had never been in love before, so I didn’t recognize the feeling at first…”

John hid his face on the crook of his lover’s neck. “I think I fell in love from the very moment I saw you but I was so scared, I thought that if I had girlfriends I would stop having feelings for you, that you were ‘married to your work’ and I was not gay… I’ve been so stupid…” he muttered “I’m sorry for everything you had to do for me Sherlock, I’m so sorry… I love you and I won’t leave you again, promised” 

Sherlock hid his nose between his sandy blonde hair and inspired the unique scent of John Watson, it soothed him, he remembered his thoughts before blanking out. “We are two halves of a whole Jawn”

John smiled. “Indeed we are. Are you getting sentimental Sherlock?” The detective snorted. 

“Never gonna happen. It’s just an observation, you are short and I’m tall and we fit perfectly when we cuddle, you are the heart, you are the one that can talk to people and be polite and you make me eat, I am the brain, I solve cases and am intelligent…”

“And very modest I see” Joked John. Sherlock blushed.

“It’s true” he poked the shorter man’s chest “can’t you see? You complete me Jawn. You are everything I am not, without you I was alone and everyone hated me. Now I’ve got you and Lestrade, Molly and Mrs Hudson that love me. You are the half of me I missed. Now I’ve found you and won’t let you go” he whispered “I love you”

John looked up at Sherlock, he was being sincere, more than ever. He loved the man.

“Love you too Sherlock. Won’t let you go either”

The detective looked like he didn’t listen to what John had said. He was lost in thought, John knew the expression and decided to wait for him to begin to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always comments and kudos are very much appreciated, they are one of the reasons I keep writing chapters...


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter (more about the case)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this is short but I am moving out of my home at the moment so I have quite a lot of things to do... This story is getting much more long than I thought... This is the longest story I wrote until now and I am thinking about adding some hinted Mystrade and then adding a second part of the story about those two... 
> 
> Let me know what you think about that maybe?

Sherlock was lost in his mind palace, the blissful sensation of sex had made his mind go in overdrive and he had blacked out. That had produced a weird effect on his thoughts. The conversation with John about being halves of a whole had triggered a chain of thoughts in his mind palace. 

As always John was his light when he was in the dark. It was so easy! Why hadn’t he realized before? Why his clever brain had not arrived at this conclusion before jumping from Bart’s roof? 

He had no idea of how many time he had been in his Mind Palace, but when he opened his eyes and found John wrapped around his body, they were both naked and he begun to feel a bit sticky, probably another shower was in order. 

He jumped from the bed, grabbed John shoulder and shook him awake. 

“John! John! We have to go!” he looked at the clock. It was already morning, Lestrade was going to be at NSY. He grinned when John opened his eyes. He kissed him, without stopping to grin, it was a bit awkward but he managed. 

John was suddenly very awake and looked at Sherlock face, he knew that expression, he had solved a puzzle, something important by the look of it. 

Sherlock jumped down the bed and winced at the pain in his backside, he glared at John accusingly and the man in question chuckled. “You are the one who wanted proper sex Sherlock” He smiled innocently. 

The detective rolled his eyes and pouted but walked toward the bathroom trying to walk straight while typing a message to Lestrade. 

John followed him, slid under his arm and read it while putting his arms around the detective. 

‘I’ve got a clue about Moriarty-SH’

John looked at him with his mouth open. “Really? What did you figure out?” 

Sherlock smiled and pushed John in the shower with him, quickly washing himself from the dried semen while beginning to explain. 

“As always is because you did something and I thought something and then that something turned out to be useful. Having sex made me realize you were my other half so I thought about other halves and I noticed that twins are part of a half. When we saw Richard Brooks he tried to protect himself with his right hand (the dominant one) but Moriarty shot himself with the left hand, Richard Brooks was right handed but Moriarty was not! He is left handed like you John! He drank his tea with the left hand” 

Sherlock finished to clean himself up and got out the shower. John followed right after. “So, are you saying that Moriarty wasn’t actually dead? It was- what?- his evil twin?”

“Quite the contrary John. Moriarty was the evil twin, he surely forced his twin to act like Richard Brooks and killed himself afterwards, probably learnt something from that cabbie you shot about manipulation” John nodded, it made sense, somehow. 

“So… There were two Moriarty, physically identical, also in DNA, no one would have guessed the difference except for you of course…” 

“I should have noticed before, but my mind was clouded. I needed sex, I needed to black out and reset my brain to get to that” He smiled at the shocked expression on John’s face. “Let’s get dressed, we have to find Moriarty and end this stupid game he is playing” 

“Amazing!” John said before kissing him on the lips once more and running to grab his discarded clothes from the bathroom floor where he had left them. 

Sherlock went to his room and looked for a clean suit. 

When they were dressed Sherlock grabbed his coat and John grabbed his jacket and they run down the stairs to get a cab. Sherlock typing furiously at his phone. John smiled, recognizing the face that Sherlock did when speaking (or in this case texting) with his brother. 

John looked at the city outside the window and smiled when he saw the building of NSY in the distance. It was like old times again. This was his normality and he was not going to change it for anything in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... Twins theory... Sorry I know it's not very original...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!!! Kudos and comments are always appreciated ^_^


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